Stories we tell ourselves

I am back from a week's holiday and am feeling refreshed and ready to go. Although I stayed in Lyon and didn't go away it was still great to take some time out. The weather was great and I was able to go to the cinema and the gym, as well as catch up with friends and even meet up with a couple of children I used to look after.

One of the reasons that I felt so good after this week, was that I was ill when it started. I had a dose of  'flu.

I was interested by this, I realized it was something that we often tell ourselves. How many of you have said the following to yourselves (or to others!)
'I'm always ill when on holiday.'
'It's like my body knows it's time to relax and out comes a cold.'
'I was ill at the weekend, typical!'
'Couldn't believe I was antibiotics, so couldn't enjoy myself properly.'
'Whenever I start working at a new place I come down with an infection.' (a real childcarer's one that!)

The thing is with these statements is that if we say them often enough then we begin to believe them. At one point when I was working at a school in Hong Kong, I seemed to come down with an illness before every single holiday. As I used to travel a lot in these holidays (making the most of being in Asia) it felt as if I experienced every country with a blocked nose. I was even predicting that I would come down with a cold and my body was a little star and obliged every time! Talk about a self fulfilling prophecy.

So, after struggling through the last couple of days in the crèche feeling awful and waking up on first day off and canceling the dentist's as I had a raging sore throat and a temperature,I realized what I was doing.
I decided that I was going to go back to bed and sleep (I am a strong believer in the body healing itself during sleep) and that when I woke up that I would be feeling better. And I did. I slept most of that day and felt so much better and was able to start enjoying my time off.
Although I have been talking about illness, we do it all the time for different situations. Another one I used to tell myself was that I was an insomniac and couldn't sleep properly. The more I said it, the more I slept badly.

So when these negative thoughts pop up in your head, or you hear yourself saying something negative, stop and think. Is it true? For me, I have been on plenty of holidays and not been ill and need to remind myself of that and change the thought. It may take a while for these new thoughts to become automatic, but keep at it and congratulate yourself for every achievement along the way.

So what story are you telling yourself?

How about making it a positive one, something that you want to happen?

Babysteps

Learning to walk combines muscle control, co-ordination and balance. It is an incredibly complex process and one that we take for granted, though it took us an average of 15 months to learn all the skills needed to suddenly be walking. Something we don't even think about now, we just stand up and move off, one foot in front of the other.

When watching the babies at work grow and develop it is a constant reminder to me how we have to put all the little things together to get the big rewards. As well as accept that we may have failures and set backs on the way and despite that, not give up.

Last week I was in the crèche I turned round to see a little 9 month old girl standing up and clutching on to the wall, with a look of delight and puzzlement on her face. This was the first time we had seen her pull herself to standing and as I was in the middle of congratulating her, she fell and cried! A cuddle and the world was soon a better place. This will not be the last time she falls in the process of learning to walk, with some inner determination she will continue to try and try again.

Likewise a little boy who is taking his first tentative steps is also falling over on a regular basis, but he will always get up and try again.
Why is at adults we are so much more likely to give up on something that we are learning to do? I went skiing one time and kept falling over. I was able to acknowledge that this was part of the learning and if I continued I would get better at it. I enjoyed the day and would like to learn properly, however the Alps are only a couple of hours away and I haven't rushed back and until I go back and spend time learning all the little bits and putting them all together, I know I will never be able to ski gracefully down the slopes.

We need to learn from the children, not only how they get up and go again but also to put the stages together bit by bit, take our time (for the really big goals) and not give up in order to succeed. We need to celebrate the baby steps on the way and allow ourselves time to become so skilled it becomes second nature.
In order to help our self motivation we also need to look to our support networks for help and encouragement - friends, families, colleagues and if needed professional teachers, trainers and coaches, to help us on the way to taking our first steps.

Spring has (hopefully) sprung!

It is such a beautiful day today! The sun is shining and there is a real hint of warmth in the air and the possibility of Spring arriving soon.
In France (like most of Europe) we had a prolonged cold snap. Although the temperatures here were not as cold as some places, for just over 2 weeks we were below zero, getting as low as -15°C and rising to the dizzy heights or -4°C during the day. I know these temperatures are often exceeded in more northerly places, but for us wimps, this was very, very, very cold.

However today has been lovely. People are sitting at the tables outside the cafes, not because they are smokers but to enjoy the weather. Strolling around with your sunglasses on was a necessity not a fashion choice. It was even possible to take my gloves off!

There is something about sunshine that raises my spirits and reminds me to take a good look at the beauty of this world and show gratitude for the beauty of nature. I am looking forward to welcoming the signs of Spring - the new leaves, the blossom on the trees, the bulbs peeping up from the earth, the first bright flashes of yellow from the daffodils.

Even though I live in the heart of a city, it is still possible to see nature all around and be inspired about what an amazing place the universe is.  I took the long way when walking back from the shops, just to enjoy the weather and to see a view that looks towards the Alps that I know looks great in the sunshine. I felt my spirits rise and my vibration and energy levels increase.

Sometimes it is the simple things that help us feel better, so as Spring begins to emerge I encourage you all to go out there and look for it, enjoy it and let Mother Nature help rise your vibrations.

Lemon and sugar.

Today is Shrove Tuesday, Mardi Gras or Carnival.....or if you're English - Pancake Day.

Yes, while in other parts of the world there is dancing, samba, disguises, dressing up, night time revelries, alcohol etc the English get excited over pancakes covered in lemon and sugar.
English pancakes are more like French crêpe than the thicker American versions, and are not a traditional breakfast meal, so tend to be eaten less over the year, making Pancake day more special.

There is an art to making the perfect pancake, my Mum used to make the batter in advance and cool it in the fridge. Then there is heating the pan, and pouring in just enough to cover the bottom of the pan - not too thick, not too thin.
Then of course there is the 'Flipping' or 'Tossing'. A great skill, that usually involves the kitchen ceiling or floor at some point during the evening.
Traditionally there races that are held all round the UK with the participants  tossing pancakes as they run. These started in Olney and have now spread across the UK. Here is a clip of our politicians (the House of Commons v the House of Lords) doing their annual race for charity.
(It is quite long, you don't have to watch it all!)

Then there is the fillings or the toppings. Savory pancakes are good, my friend does a lovely ham and mushroom filling, but the favourites are, of course, the sweet ones. In France the obsession for Nutella spreads onto crêpes, as well as jam and just plain sugar. Me, I love the traditional combination of lemon and sugar - the tartness of the lemon, softened by the sweetness of the sugar, as well as the softness of the pancake mixed with the crunchiness of the sugar, how can you beat that?

If my friends Facebook status' are anything to go by, then the adults are enjoying this day as much as the children.
There is something joyful about celebrating a tradition, something that you remember from your childhood. It is comforting and nurturing and brings back good feelings and memories, all the family sitting round in the kitchen cooking, eating and enjoying ourselves. All this from a simple mixture of flour, milk and eggs. Truly something to celebrate.

I am grateful for anything that helps us feel better and keeps us in a good feeling place and vibration, I hope you all have your comforters that help you feel good too.

Good Morning 2

Wow, just have to give you all an update.
I've been doing the Snooze Gratitude (as I mentally call it) for about two weeks now and have been seeing some amazing results.
Not only have I felt more centred and grounded, things have been going well in other ways. I seem to have more energy and work (both in the crèche and the coaching) goes well.
However I have to tell you about last weekend. I had to fly back to the UK to sort out some paperwork and stuff. Everything flowed so easily for me during the entire weekend, here are some examples

There was a last minute hiccup with the paperwork on Saturday and the 'other office' was closed and I was flying out the next day. I stayed calm and instead of argueing and saying 'But you knew I was only here for the weekend!' and adding stress to the situation, I set the intention that the right outcome would happen. I got a call tonight saying that everything had been sorted and gone through as planned!!

Despite snow in London my return flight was only delayed by 45 mins (when other flights were cancelled and severely delayed.)

I intended on doing some shopping and boy, did I shop and even better - most things on my list were on offer, 3 for 2, buy 1 get 1 half price, BOGOF etc. I started laughing at how many offers I was getting. To top it all the Body Shop were selling my favourite hand cream for £5 (instead of £10), I took two to the till and was told that if I spent £15, I would get a free shower gel, so I brought 3 tubes and the till recipt read 'Spent £15, saved £19'!

I found books I wanted in the second hand charity shops for next to nothing, clothes I wanted in the sizes I wanted in the last of the sales.

I also met up with the people I wanted to and had fun catching up with the news and gossip, had some meals that I wanted (including a yummy curry - which is hard to get in France).

It was a great 48 hours and I loved every minute, especially those that I spent every morning, doing my 'Snooze Gratitude' and over the weekend I had more and more to be thankful for!

On anothe note - a couple of people have asked shouldn't they be doing this in the evening, when going to bed. My response to this is that as long as it is done when you are in the stage between being fully awake and asleep, then you will get all the benefits. So what ever suits your timetable/body clock best. If you are a leap out of bed the moment the alarm clock goes off, then the morning may not be best for you. I am a hit the snooze button and retreat back under the duvet person, so the morning works best for me. I encourage you to experiment and find the best time for you.

GOOD Morning!

Any one who knows me can tell you that I am not a morning person! I am definitely a night owl and love it and have no real wish to change - except when I have to get out of bed early in the morning.
I have recently discovered a great way of making this a lot easier.

Every morning, before I get out of bed, I now do a Rampage of Appreciation and this automatically sets me up in a good mood for the day.
This is how I do it.
When my alarm goes, I hit the snooze button and snuggle back under the duvet. Insted of going back to sleep, I start saying 'Thank you ..' I tend to start off with things like 'Thank you for a great night's sleep', 'Thank you for a warm, cozy bed', or things I like about myself 'Thank you for my lovely, shiny hair' and then move onto things that have happened to me recently - a new client, a great phone call, a good night out etc. Then when I'm super charged and feeling fantastic, I start saying thank you for things that I want to happen in my life, as if they are already there. 'Thank you for those lovely new boots'. Each time I say thank you for something, I picture it vividly in my mind and see it in front of me and get into the feeling place of having it in my life.

This process works on several different levels. To be in a feeling a gratitude is one of the highest vibrational/feel good places to be. As it is first thing in the morning and I haven't really woken up properly (and in a warm and comfortable bed) I am naturally in a good mood and it only takes a few thank yous to raise my mood even more. Also as I am still in a place between sleeping and waking my brain is already in a relaxed state and the process becomes meditative and starts reprogramming my subconscious mind to focus and and take note of the good things that are happening in my life.

It also really enjoy doing it and find the 5 minutes snooze time on my alarm never seems long enough. I have only been doing it for a few days and now set my alarm 10 mins early, to allow me more time and I look forward to the weekends when I can spend as long as I want being grateful.
Since I have been doing this, my mornings seem to flow more easily and instead of being in a rush and a panic (and feeling half asleep) I feel calm and centered and as if I have all the time in the world.
Please try it and let me know how it works for you.

Inside Out

Let me introduce you to Barbs, she's a woman I used to work with a while ago. She was one of those people who come into your life and you are glad to have there. She was always patient and kind and rarely got angry, and if she did she would soon shrug it off. She loved her family and her work and had an active social life, she was fun to be around as well as calm and peaceful.

I had finished my Nursery Nursing training a couple of years before and was working in a Social Services Day Care Centre in London, working with young children and their families from deprived backgrounds. Work was hard, despite being preschoolers, these kids were tough! Barbs was an unqualified member of staff on the team and I was lucky enough to be working alongside her and, despite all my training, I learnt so much from her. She was a natural with young children and they adored her. I was able to watch how she could coax a child out of a tantrum, encourage a stubborn child to participate and persuade a disruptive child to cooperate in a group activity. Tricks and tips that I still use and teach others to use today. All the staff liked her (and in an all female environment that was quite a feat!) and she was popular amongst the parents too.

Barbs saw the positive in everyone, including some of our more disagreeable parents, was quick to praise and be grateful and slow to criticize and complain. Life seemed easy for her and things came to her all the time. She enjoyed bingo and was always winning something - she had a store of toasters and kettles that she was happy to pass onto others when their's had broken. She saw her children and grandchildren regularly and was looking forward to her retirement in a few years time. I was going through a bad time in my home life and she always seemed to know if I needed cheering up, space to be quiet or a shoulder to cry on.

Although we have lost contact I still think of her and wonder what she is doing, and she still influences my behaviour today. Barbs was one of those people that you aspire to be like, I'm not sure if I have achieved that, but I think she'd be pleased if she could see me now.
Looking back on it now I can see she was unknowingly practicing what has become know as the Law of Attraction. That her inner thoughts were creating and shaping her outside reality. As she saw the best in everyone, they wanted to show her their best. She loved with a big heart and was showered with love in return. Although she was not physically rich she was grateful and contended with what she had and I truly believe did not want more as she had a great spiritual wealth and this pleased her more than the thought of a bigger house or a more expensive car.
My biggest wish is that everyone, at some point,  has someone like Barbs in their life too.